Deadbeat dad asks ex-wife to forgive $65,000 worth of child support he has owed since his daughter turned 18 twenty years ago, mom laughs in his face: 'He's been under a court order to pay me child support since September 1987 and has paid nothing'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Nov 17, 2024 8:00 PM EST

It's so wild when a 60-something-year-old adult expects their lifelong habits never to bite them in the rear end. If you ate horribly your whole life and never exercised, you shouldn't be surprised when you have health issues when you age. While the biological clock waits for no man, you might think you're above man-made systems and processes, like the court system. A deadbeat parent might expect that if they've evaded paying child support for their kid's entire childhood, they won't have to pay it once they turn 18. Much like taxes, child support payments don't just evaporate when the month they were due passes by. 

The deadbeat dad in this story pressured the parent who actually raised his kid to let bygones be bygones instead of owning up to his very real and harmful mistakes. Though the mother of his child may never get what she's owed, she won't let him get off easy. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10428703232
    via Curated Lifestyle (Unsplash+)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITAH for laughing at my ex when he asked me to forgive his back child support?
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 03
    My ex (M62, now) and I (F64, now) got divorced with one infant child in 1987. His support until 1992 was $50/month. He never paid this. He never worked for a pay check, only for cash. In 1992 I went to increase his support to be what he would pay if he earned federal minimum wage. He never paid. Never saw my daughter after she turned 7 in 1993, no cards, calls, nothing. Which is good and left our family to be a family!
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 04
    Fast forward to 2004, my daughter is now 18 yo. I start to receive small child support deposits of $64/week. I am shocked and dismayed but happy. A few weeks later I get a call from my ex, Shannon, saying "isn't she 18 now? Tell them to stop taking the support.". I laughed and said no, you will always owe the back amount, plus interest. I can't stop it. So he quits working.
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 05
    Then no word from him for years. Comes to 2021 I get a call from Shannon. Surprised by this I ask why the h_I he wants. He wants me to fill out a form to FORGIVE his past support of $65,000+. He SWORE that he would then pay me directly $300/mo until the balance is paid, 217 months. Now remember he's been under a court order to pay me child support since Sept 1987 and has paid nothing. When it was taken from his pay, rather than work, he chose to quit his job.
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 06
    I found out through some online research that this was about the time that the AG of TX, where Shannon lived with his wife, had filed a lien against Shannon for the back child support amount. I had no clue this was done! So Shannon's wife doesn't want him to be on their single wide deed because of the lien, so she divorces him.
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 07
    This is why he wants me to forgive his child support, he was losing his sugar momma!! He's called three times since then and just when I stop laughing I get another call from him. Am I the a_h_le for laughing at him, in his old age, for not letting him off the hook for this $65,000+ in back child support that I KNOW I will never see a dime of?
    via u/Inevitable_Bill4180
  • 08
    CozyCupcake25 No, he seems to need to pay up, and having a nice chuckle is merely a bonus.
    via u/CozyCupcake25
  • 09
    Sugari_Flawless This is just hilarious, I'd laugh too if I were you, he should pay up and take responsibility, in the end its your child's right
    via u/Sugari_Flawless
  • 10
    ItsEmi21 You are NOT the a_h_le! He's been dodging child support for DECADES. He's lucky you even bothered to take his calls. Honestly, I'd be laughing too. He's trying to weasel out of his responsibilities at 62 years old? He's got some nerve! He doesn't get to just erase his debt because he's losing his "sugar momma." He needs to pay up, and you're right to hold him accountable. Enjoy the chuckle, girl. You've earned it.
    via u/ItsEmi21_
  • 11
    svkatt ΝΤΑ My ex complained that after the wage garnishment (I had been supporting my daughter by myself for 10 years by then), that he didn't even have enough money to buy cologne... I'm like, I guess you're just going to have to stink then!!! I got a few of his tax returns once he decided to get a real job. You keep on laughing every time he calls. I'll be laughing with you
    via u/svkatt
  • 12
    thekyledavid Imagine being so desperate to make yourself out to be the victim but the best you can come up with is having to buy store-brand cologne
    via u/thekyledavid
  • 13
    DinoAnkylosaurus • 14h ago • I hate deadbeat dads who work to game the system. I once worked in the office for a company with a high turnover, and realized some guys knew the system so well, and how long it took to get a new support order to the employer, and they'd quit a week before it would take effect. A month later they'd get rehired and it was rinse and repeat over and over.
    via u/DinoAnkylosaurus
  • 14
    So I started entering orders for people who'd been terminated but had been hired at least twice, and set up an alert of anyone with an order was re-hired. And I'd get on the phone with the CS office for that state (barring a couple that were a PITA) and let them know he'd been re-hired and could they fax in a current order? Sometime I'd have active orders two or three days after they were hired. Surprise, buddy!
    via u/DinoAnkylosaurus
  • 15
    Background Heat5080 You are a hero.
    via u/BackgroundHeat5080
  • 16
    Interesting-Fish6065 Not all heroes wear capes, lol. I understand that break-ups can be messy, cause hard feelings, that situations are complicated. But organizing your life around the principle of making sure the person raising your child never seems a dime from you? I do not get it.
    via u/Interesting-Fish6065
  • 17
    caylem00 Because hurting the other/ their ego is more important to them than their child
    via u/caylem00
  • 18
    speakeasy12345 NTA. Plus the kicker is since he wasn't working or was being paid under the table, he has likely screwed himself out of a significant amount of SSI when he wants to official apply for retirement benefits, since the amount he contributed will be minimal. Too bad for him. It is ultimately going to cost him much more than just paying his child support would have. Sad for him to spend his last years poor and alone, all for $50/month.
    via u/speakeasy12345
  • 19
    busdrivermike • 14h ago • As a guy who paid child support for 15 years, starting at $750, ending at $1950 per month in 2015, no way you should let him off. If you ain't going to do it for you, do it for the rest of us who paid. Because I guarantee that I will rub it in if you sign those papers, telling dudes they don't have to pay either.
    via u/busdrivermike
  • 20
    AngelxGaze Totally get where you're coming from. After paying for 15 years, it's hard to just let someone like that off the hook. If you sign those papers, it's not just about him it sends the wrong message to everyone who's done the right thing. He's had more than enough chances, and it's not fair to let him walk away now.
    via u/AngelxGaze
  • 21
    ChibiSailorMercury Anyway, it's not up to you to give up child support. It's your child's right, not yours. So you can laugh all the way to the bank (and make no deposit once you reach your destination). NTA
    via u/ChibiSailorMercury
  • 22
    grayblue_grrl NTA. My ex did pretty much the same. He ended up getting injured at work and was able to collect Our youngest was 18 and had just joined the military. The government had his child support coming off of that and I collected for a number of years. It paid for daycare for our granddaughter.
    via u/grayblue_grrl
  • 23
    Since he had lied to everyone that he paid his child support all along, they wondered why I could get it after the youngest was 18. He told them I was just greedy. You aren't laughing alone.
    via u/grayblue_grrl

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single mother family drama deadbeat court reddit story deadbeat dad child support dad family reddit thread Reddit mom money single mom Parenting Fail Father
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